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November 6, 2025
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Earth and the Moon, personified with human-like bodies and celestial heads, sit together at a trendy café table. Earth wears thick-rimmed glasses and a beanie while sipping oat milk from a mason jar. The Moon, also personified, wears black sunglasses and a casual sweater, appearing relaxed and cool.
  • Galactical News

Milky Way Rebrands as “Oat Milk Galaxy” to Attract Younger Demographics

November 5, 2025
Plankton sits at his underwater home office desk wearing a headset, startled as a massive whale swims past his window.
  • Local News

Remote Employee Claims to Hear Whale Song Outside His Window, Coworkers Confirm He Might Be Living in Bikini Bottom

November 3, 2025
A tipped-over Pumpkin Spice Latte cup spills foamy liquid into a storm drain surrounded by scattered autumn leaves on a wet street.
  • Local News

Pumpkin Spice Outbreak Reaches Midwest Sewage Systems

November 1, 2025
Young girl in witch costume uses a tablet while sitting on a couch, surrounded by overflowing Halloween candy bags.
  • Technology News

New “Trick-or-Treat Prime” App Lets Kids Order Candy Without Leaving the House

October 30, 2025
Animatronic zombie clown standing beside a clearance bin of bizarre Halloween costumes inside a dimly lit Spirit Halloween store.
  • Business News

Spirit Halloween Opens Store Inside Abandoned Spirit Halloween

October 28, 2025
A man in his early 30s yells into a black mailbox while holding a food delivery flyer, standing on the walkway of a suburban home.
  • Business News
  • Technology News

AWS Outage Plunges World Into Chaos as Humans Forget How to Human Without Wi-Fi

October 26, 2025
A man sitting on a couch with a laptop on his lap, clenching his fists in frustration as he sees a paywall pop-up on an article titled “Ten Ways to Reduce Stress,” which demands $4.99 monthly and includes a “Scream Now” button for an extra $2.99 add-on.
  • Editor's Picks
  • Lifestyle News

Everything Costs Money Now…Except This Madness

October 18, 2025
A frustrated man sitting on a toilet in a modern public restroom, holding a smartphone that reads “LOADING YOUR WIPE ALLOCATION…” while glowing digital ads on the stall walls promote “Sponsored by Charmin” and “Watch this 15-second video for 2-ply.”
  • Lifestyle News

Trickle-Down Economics Has Officially Reached the Restroom

October 16, 2025
An angry, human-like tree with arms on its hips glares down at a white Range Rover that has crashed into its trunk, while a blue garbage truck lingers in the background.
  • Entertainment News

Baldwin Crashes Wife’s Car, Blames Whale-Truck and Big Fat Tree. Plot Twist: He’s Fine

October 14, 2025
Evolution of Man chart ending with a Gen Z figure hunched over, texting emojis on a smartphone.
  • Lifestyle News

Walter Translates the Youths: A Guide to Communicating With Modern Grunts

September 26, 2025

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