Food & Health News

Food and Health News

A man in a car at a Burger King drive-thru wipes away tears while holding a Whopper, with a tissue box on the dashboard and a faint burger reflection in the window.

Burger King Introduces “Emotional Support Whopper” for People Who Cry in Drive-Thrus

Detroit skyline under a thick haze, with a single duck on the shore covering its beak with its wing.

Air Quality at Crisis Levels: Authorities Attribute to Canadian Fires, Witnesses Whisper Otherwise

A frustrated man stands in front of a glowing high-tech smart fridge displaying a red warning message that reads “ACCESS DENIED: EMOTIONAL NEGLIGENCE DETECTED,” while shelves inside the fridge show junk food like popcorn, donuts, and pudding.

Smart Fridge Gains Sentience, Refuses to Open Unless Owner Apologizes for 2AM Cheese Incident

doctor holding patient chart for too much reality, irony deficiency

Satirist Hospitalized After Attempting to Read the News Without Screaming

Cheeseburger May Contain Traces of Reality

FDA Finally Admits: Everything Tastes Better with a Sprinkle of Denial

New Pepsi Can Peeling to Reveal Coca-Cola

Pepsi’s “New Formula” Found to Be Just Old Coca-Cola; Shareholders Demand Answers

McDonald's Employee Wide-Eyed When Asked What's In the McRib

Leaked Internal Memo: McDonald’s Staff Told to “Just Nod” If Customers Ask What’s in McRib

office workers sitting around staring at phones instead of working

Procrastination Reaches Epidemic Levels: Deadline for Solutions Pushed to Next Week

McLuxury Nuggets in velvet box with Tears of the Working Class dipping sauce

McDonald’s Testing $100 “McLuxury Nuggets” Made from an Endangered Bird (It’s Fine, They’re Regenerating It with AI)

February 24, 2025

Paper straw tyranny in the streets

The Final Straw: Paper Tubes Leading Us to Doom

February 11, 2025