Billionaire Launches Charitable Foundation to Help Billionaires Cope With Being Called Billionaires

“The word just sits there in the sentence, staring at you,” says founder Preston Whitmore IV, 54, whose net worth is $54 billion, which he’d really prefer you didn’t mention.

Greenwich, CT – On a crisp Tuesday morning, Preston Whitmore IV stood before a crowd of journalists, three grief counselors, and a string quartet playing something tasteful but not showy, and announced that he had suffered enough. The suffering, he clarified, was emotional. The setting was his smaller estate. The catering was described on the invoice as “healing-forward.”¹

Whitmore, 54, is the founder of BillionStrong, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit dedicated to providing mental health resources, peer support groups, and restorative wilderness retreats to billionaires who have been, in his words, “ambushed by their own net worth in a public sentence.” The foundation launched Monday with a $200 million seed donation from Whitmore himself, which his publicist confirmed was “absolutely not a tax thing” before her left eye began twitching in a way that suggested it was, at least partially, a tax thing.

“The word ‘billionaire’ has become weaponized,” Whitmore said, reading from notes on what appeared to be a custom Hermes notepad.³ “It’s othering. It’s reductive. It tells you nothing about who a person actually is, their passions, their fears, their $340 million Maldives compound. We are so much more than a number.” He paused. “The number, in my case, is fifty-four billion. But that is entirely beside the point.”

Dr. Pamela Reiss, BillionStrong’s Head of Emotional Ecosystems,⁴ says the need is urgent and scientifically documented. “We conducted a study,” she said. “When a billionaire hears the word ‘billionaire,’ their cortisol spikes measurably, especially when followed by the words ‘should,’ ‘pay,’ or ‘taxes.’ Also ‘accountability.’ Also ‘the rest of us.’ Also, in severe cases, a question mark.” She paused to let that settle. “We haven’t published the study,” she added. “We’re waiting for the right moment.” The study was completed in 2021.

The foundation also announced a public awareness campaign titled #JustANumber, urging everyday Americans to “think twice before casually mentioning someone’s eleven-digit net worth in polite conversation.” Billboards will appear in New York, Los Angeles, and one small town in Ohio that Whitmore selected for what he called “its symbolic resonance with the American middle.”⁵ The awareness campaign carries a budget of $40 million, which several observers noted is the annual GDP of a small nation, which Whitmore noted he also has a stake in.⁶

Senator Diane Foltz called BillionStrong “the most expensive cry for help in the history of Western civilization.” A GoFundMe titled “Help Regular People Cope With Billionaires Existing” raised $1.4 million in eleven hours before Whitmore’s legal team dispatched what sources described as “a very long and surprisingly emotional email.”

At the close of the press conference, a reporter asked whether Whitmore worried the foundation might come across as tone-deaf. He considered this at length. A fountain burbled somewhere nearby. A hawk circled overhead. The string quartet, apparently unaware the event had ended forty minutes prior, continued playing. A second hawk arrived. Everyone waited.

“I think,” he said at last, “that’s exactly the kind of thinking BillionStrong exists to heal.” He then boarded a waiting helicopter, not to travel anywhere in particular, his assistant clarified, but because his therapist says the liftoff helps with closure.⁷ The helicopter’s name, stenciled in tasteful gold lettering beneath the door, was Perspective.

It lifted off. The hawks watched it go. Gerald waved.

Footnotes

1. The catering bill totaled $118,000. Line item 7: “Empathy Amuse-Bouche (per person): $340.” There were 22 guests. Line item 14: “Emotional Support Cheese.” No quantity listed. No further explanation provided. ↩︎
2. Yelp has since flagged the review as potentially inauthentic. The account responded: “I am a real person with real feelings and I would appreciate if you would stop.” The flag remains. P. Whitmore IV has not replied further. Gerald replied on his behalf. Yelp removed Gerald’s reply. ↩︎
3. The notepad retails for $340. Whitmore confirmed it was a gift from himself, to himself, for his birthday, celebrated alone on the yacht for what he called “reflective reasons.” Gerald attended. ↩︎
4. “Head of Emotional Ecosystems” is a title Dr. Reiss created herself upon joining BillionStrong. Her previous title, at a different wellness firm, was “Chief Feelings Architect.” She left that role due to what HR paperwork describes as “an irreconcilable feelings environment.” She does not elaborate. She has, by all accounts, a great many feelings about it. ↩︎
5. The town is Findlay, Ohio. No one in Findlay was consulted. Local resident Dave Pruitt, 47, responded to the news with the word “huh” and went back inside to watch the game. He did not specify which game. ↩︎
6. He does not technically own a nation. He has a 34% stake in one. There are lawyers. This footnote is not the place. ↩︎
7. The helicopter costs $6,200/hr to operate. It flew in a slow, meditative circle above the estate for 22 minutes and then landed. Whitmore described the experience as “genuinely transformative.” He has booked it again for Thursday. And Friday. Gerald does not fly but stood outside and watched, which Whitmore says “counts.” ↩︎

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