Discovery of “Tipped Over” Black Hole: Universe’s Drunk Uncle Finally Found

ANTOFAGASTA, CHILE – Astronomers at the Very Large Telescope (yes, that’s its real name—points for creativity, guys) in Chile have stumbled upon what they’re calling a “tipped-over black hole,” and it’s giving major drunk-uncle-at-the-family-BBQ vibes. This cosmic oddball, officially named JX1948+265 (but let’s call it Uncle Larry), is lounging sideways in its galactic recliner, guzzling star matter like it’s cheap beer at a tailgate.

“We’ve never seen anything like this,” said Dr. Astra Nomical, lead researcher and amateur karaoke champion. “Most black holes are upright and spinning neatly, like cosmic figure skaters. But this one? It’s just lying there, sideways, like it forgot how to universe.”

The discovery has baffled scientists, who were initially drawn to the phenomenon after noticing unusual gravitational waves that sounded suspiciously like a burp. “At first, we thought it was interference,” Dr. Nomical admitted. “But nope. Turns out, this guy just hit the cosmic buffet a little too hard and is now in full-on nap mode.”

“We think it might have collided with another black hole or maybe just had one too many interstellar cocktails,” Dr. Nomical explained. “It’s basically the cosmos equivalent of an uncle who falls asleep mid-toast at Thanksgiving.”

The internet, of course, is having a field day. Memes of the sideways black hole have flooded social media, with captions like, “When the galaxy’s spinning but you’re not,” and “Zero-G Hangover.” One post features a photoshopped Uncle Larry sipping a giant space margarita, with the caption: “Orbit responsibly.” One particularly unhinged theory claims Uncle Larry is protesting the lack of universal healthcare for black holes.

NASA has proposed sending a probe to investigate, tentatively named Operation Sit Up Straight, but opinion are mixed. “Honestly, we’re just curious if it’ll roll over when we poke it,” one intern confessed. “We just want to make sure it doesn’t throw a tantrum and start flinging quasars at us.”

As for Uncle Larry, it remains unbothered, snacking up stars like they’re chips at a Super Bowl party, contributing absolutely nothing of value to the galaxy except comedic inspiration. Astronomers are taking notes—and possibly tips on how to nap so spectacularly.

So, while the rest of the universe keeps spinning responsibly, Uncle Larry remains the celestial embodiment of, “I’ll get to it later.” And honestly? Same, Larry. Same.