Nativity Scene Drama: Shepherds Quit Over Equal Pay Dispute with Wise Men

In what’s being dubbed “Bethlehem’s Most Bitter Labor Dispute,” the shepherds in a local nativity scene have staged a dramatic walkout, citing unequal pay compared to the Wise Men. This historic tableau of peace and goodwill has now devolved into a spectacle of picket signs, chants, and sheep roaming aimlessly without supervision.

The dispute began when the shepherds discovered the Wise Men were compensated not only with gold, frankincense, and myrrh but also with complimentary parking and unlimited fig rolls at the craft services table. In stark contrast, the shepherds report being paid in “exposure” and “the opportunity to work near a live baby,” which, according to them, does not cover the rising costs of oatcakes and wool tunics.

“We’re out here with one staff—literally a wooden staff—and they’re gliding in on camels, decked out in silk robes. It’s blatant classism!” said Ezekiel, the self-appointed union leader for the shepherds, while holding a picket sign reading “No Justice, No Sheeps!”

The Wise Men, for their part, deny any wrongdoing. “Look, we earned our titles. Do you have any idea how hard it is to navigate the desert by starlight? Plus, myrrh doesn’t pay for itself,” said Melchior, while polishing his gold medallion. “If the shepherds wanted better pay, they should’ve invested in career development. I hear there’s a free star-mapping class in Jerusalem next month.”

Meanwhile, the nativity scene organizers are scrambling to fill the shepherd-shaped void. Reports suggest they’ve reached out to local drama students, offering “experience for their resumes,” but none have accepted due to the poor lighting and no Instagram Live options.

Baby Jesus, who has yet to comment publicly, was overheard cooing in frustration. Sources close to the Holy Family say Mary has requested everyone “chill” because “this is not what Silent Night was about.”

With Christmas just weeks away, the community is left to wonder: Can this humble nativity scene ever return to its tranquil glory, or will the shepherds forever remain the unsung heroes of Bethlehem’s labor revolution? Stay tuned.